random musing

2010-01-10T09:10:00.000-08:00

So, it was three years ago yesterday that the wind and its power changed my life. An anniversary for me of many things. I remember God's miracles and His mercy to me and my family, I remember the steadiness of my family, the faithfulness of my friends. I celebrate those things.

May it always serve as a reminder that life is so much more brief than we think - so keep the people who are important close. Consider what matters.

Time only runs one way.

2010-01-04T08:21:00.000-08:00

I woke up with thoughts...musings....so I thought maybe I would write them down here and see where it goes.

So, our Government has 'pirogued' parliament yet again. Essentially shut parliament and democracy down until after the Vancouver Olympics. If nothing else, this tells us that Stephen Harper is a pretty smart strategist. Because parliament will not be meeting until into March, the opposition cannot continue to probe about the torture and abuse of Afghan detainees, it also cannot pick up on our pathetic showing at Copenhagen.(But for the record, I don't know that the Liberals would have shown any better at Copenhagen!). No more questions regarding the Conservatives giving so much more stimulus cash to their own ridings. What I think that this will do is carry us into Spring where the Conservatives will set their course to provoke a general election. Why? Because it looks like they will be able to form a majority. Finally. The Liberals...well, let's just say Mr. Ignatieff is not measuring up to be the saviour we thought he might be once upon a time for the Liberal party. He is low low low in the polls. And so is his party. The NDP - I'm pretty confident that Canada as a whole is not prepared to have an NDP government and so that leaves the Conservatives with a pretty slam dunk kind of election.

Of course, things could change. Some great story or screw up or scandal could change everything.

But the other random thought bouncing in my head is the Afghan war. Or more specifically the soldiers who are brought home from it. I LOVE that way our men and women are returned home. Families and cameras filming as their bodies, draped in a Canadian flag, are brought off the planes - with dignity and honour. I love that Canadians show up to show support for those families. I love the "Highway of Heroes" and the people and cars who stop to show their respect as the processional goes by. It has nothing to do with the war itself. Which I hate. I hate that we are in Afghanistan. It has everything to do with people. People who are grieving and just standing with them. In spirit.

It's such a simple thing.

2009-10-28T10:11:00.001-07:00

My brother in law sent this video to us this morning. It's a beautiful tribute to the fallen soldiers that have served Canada. I may not support this war...but I do honour and respect the men and women who have chosen to spend their lives this way.

http://www.youtube.com/user/stuartotaku#p/a/u/1/w6s-J2SSXgQ

2009-10-02T14:10:00.000-07:00

I am currently in the middle of a book called "The world needs your kid - How to raise children who care and contribute". Some students from the High School went to see the Dalai Lama and friends the other day and this is one of the books they brought home. So far it's excellent. I found the following stats VERY interesting. Maybe you will too...

-Families are so over-scheduled that in the past twenty years structured sports time has doubled, household conversations have become far less frequent and family dinners have declined 33 per cent, according to over-scheduling expert Dr. Alvin Rosenfeld.

-Since the 1970's, children have lost 12 hours a week in free time, including a 25 per cent drop in play overall, according to the University of Michigan's Survey Research Center.

-Students were found to be spending 8 hours more each week in school than kids 20 years ago. During this period, homework time has nearly doubled, according to Michigan researchers.

-Although the National Sleep Foundation claims students need 9 hours of sleep to be ready for school, most teens get between 7 and 71/2 hours of sleep each night.

-A Gallup poll in 2005 showed that only 28 per cent of American families with children eat together 7 nights a week, a 10 per cent drop from 3 years earlier.

-A 2004 study at the University of Minnesota found that teens who ate 5 or 6 meals a week with their families were 7 to 24 per cent less likely to smoke cigarettes or marijuana, drink alcohol, get lower grades or show signs of depression.

-A 2007 report by the Ottawa based Vanier Institute for the Family found that Canadian workers spend 45 minutes less with their families each day than they did 20 years ago.

2009-09-29T10:09:00.000-07:00

Well, hi. Remember me? Yup, I'm back. Maybe. Since that last post way back in the Summer so much has happened and there is so little to say. But here I am for those of you who have asked...and by the way...thanks for asking.

I have had a summer of shall we say, growth. Isn't that what trials are supposed to bring about? So I guess I grew a great deal this summer. My job. Well, it's over. And I'm relieved - I LOVED the job but there were other complications...people, power and politics and they just proved to be to much stress for me.

But really the job stress proved to be relatively insignificant compared to other events of the summer. Tragedies. Plural. In the span of a month we buried two young men who were 19 & 21 years old. Then on Labor Day a wonderful and godly man that we loved dearly passed away after a short 8 month battle with pancreatic cancer. He was 67. Alex and Dacre were young. They had little time to build a lasting legacy. But Nick did. His death is still heartbreaking and tragic. But the legacy he left will last many lifetimes. We were also confronted with the diagnosis of cancer. Two actually. One is my Brother in laws dad. The other a friend's aunt. This other friend also has a 10 year old niece diagnosed with a very rare disease that will eventually take her life - sooner rather than later.

So it's been a weighty summer. Heavy. But faced with death you are also confronted with how you live. You know what? It matters HOW you live. The daily choices we make matter. Our lives are short.

It's easy to forget that.

2009-06-23T10:00:00.000-07:00

I wish I could say that "time flies when you're having fun" - but in this case the truer statement would be "time flies when you're stinkin' busy". This working thing has really cut into my time. Don't misunderstand - there are things about my job I absolutely love. Other things will be ironed out with time. It's a big learning curve.

My girls are winding up grades 9 and 7. Both will be in the high school next year - which is a treat for me. They'll both be able to walk and to come home for lunch. Reid's busy at work (the season for bottled water begins NOW) and along side of the job, I am still volunteering at the Teen Challenge Ladies Centre. And still loving it. We'll be celebrating another grad - two beautiful women who have been clean and sober for an entire year. Two lives radically changed and transformed by a power beyond what they have ever known. By a God who loves them like they've never been loved before. It's such a gift for me to celebrate with them.

This summer will be different. My job will require some weekends - so that will limit our camping/traveling plans. We'll still make the most - we'll just have to plan and prepare a little more. We just got the "Beautiful BC" magazine with "50 things to do in BC before you die". We'll start checking things off that list beginning this summer.

So much fun to have, so little summer left to do it....

2009-05-13T08:35:00.000-07:00

I cannot believe how quickly things change in life. The blink of an eye. Really. I was offered and accepted the position of Curator/Site Manager of the Yale Historical Site and Museum. Holy Canolie. I'm slightly overwhelmed, possibly in over my head. But I'm beyond excited at the opportunity. I love museums. Always have. And oddly enough, I've always had a soft spot for Yale. I have many many fond memories of spending weekends in Yale at the Ball Park when my dad played and coached the Yale Mens Fastball team. We spent lots of time in the community. So this is a great challenge and I'm thrilled.

So while my life is changing - apparently BC is not. We've elected Gordon Campbell and the Liberal Government for a third consecutive term and said NO to the STV. Seems that with the recession people are afraid of rocking the boat and shaking things up. I suppose I can understand that. Maybe not my own choice but I do understand. You do have to wonder at the stat I just heard - only 48% of eligible voters chose to cast a ballot in this election. That is incredibly low. It seems that apathy as well as fear of change was the order of the day.

I can only hope that the Liberals lead well. That they are not as ruthless with cuts to health care and education. That they are well opposed by the NDP.

We'll see.

2009-05-08T08:38:00.001-07:00

Crazy busy. That's been my week. Not complaining mind you - just a tad surprised at how things turn around so quickly. You know, I've been off caffeine for just over a month now and as I sit here and type and sip on my decaf - well, I still miss that hit of caffeine first thing in the morning. I wonder if it ever goes away...

I've been painting. Lots. Not always a canvas, sometimes, like yesterday, it was all my upstairs doors. They all match now - they were 3 different colours before. So that's kinda nice.

Mothers Day is coming up this wkd. I'm looking forward to it, as always. My kids celebrate me and I celebrate my mom. She really is something. I've not always appreciated her for who she is. I do now. She set an amazing example of what it is to offer unconditional love and support.

2009-05-05T09:32:00.000-07:00

Well, soon I will be an official employee at the Yale Museum and Heritage Site. Quite exciting for me. I will help out in the museum itself, the gift shop and with some of the tours. It's going to be a big learning curve - I know very little about Yale's history. So I guess I'll be doing some reading...no hardship there. This job is really a good fit: I love museums, it is no stress, and I'll be able to help build something worthwhile in my community.

I also have started painting. Though it is a little trickier finding the time than I thought it would be. The only reason I made the effort yesterday was because I wrote down that I would. So this writing is keeping me accountable.

Blogs can be good things.

2009-05-04T09:01:00.000-07:00

Such a weekend. Reid had to work Sat. and Sun. so it was just the girls and I. We spent most of Sat. outside in the yard. Working, digging, prepping...very tiring but very satisfying.

The sermon yesterday was about simplicity. Living simply - in terms of stuff and in terms of attitude. It was a thoughtful and somewhat provoking message. I'm still processing and I'll write more as I do. Reid & I watched a movie last night called "Into the Wild". It fit well along the theme of Simplicity. I wasn't expecting to really enjoy it. But I did. It was a true story about a 23 year old man in the States who made some radical lifestyle choices in the 1990's. It was slow. But it was beautifully filmed and had some even more beautiful truth contained in it. Kinda a tale about finding truth and happiness and what that looks like. ***SPOILER**** If you like happy ending - you aren't gonna like this movie. I must confess after hanging in there for the slow paced 2 hours plus - it was a huge let down of an ending. But on the other hand...well, it was a story worth telling and watching.

I'm heading out to Yale today. I'm going to be working this Summer for the Yale Historical Society. I'm not sure what that looks like right now - I'll know more after today. But suffice it to say I'm very much looking forward to it. I've always loved Yale so I think it will be a good fit for me.

And this evening I will spend some time painting. I'm going to finish a painting I've had sitting for weeks and weeks. I'm finally ready to wrap it up.

Good things on the horizon.

2009-05-01T08:37:00.000-07:00

Who had the best night ever? Me. Uh huh. Yes I did.

Last night was my evening at the Teen Challenge Ladies Center and I had a blast. For one, they all pooled the little bit of money they had and bought pizza - yum! But it seems I've been there enough now that the girls are at home with me. They talk and share and struggle things out in front of me. It is really eye opening to hear their stories, to hear the craziness of what was normal in their world. It makes me very grateful for the family I've had and the life I've been blessed with.

It's really amazing to see the difference between the girls who will graduate the program in a couple months and the lovely but so hard young woman who arrived four days ago. God really does transform and change people. He really heals. He really loves unconditionally.

And I can't believe I get to be a part of it all.

2009-04-30T08:39:00.000-07:00

Almost exactly one month since I wrote anything here. It seems that there hasn't been much floating around in the gray matter that translated well onto the page.

Not that I have much now - I am just missing the discipline of organizing my thoughts and writing them down. So we'll see what happens today. I'm so out of practice ...I bumped into a woman that I know just a little but would like to know better - she is an aspiring writer. We talked about the discipline of just writing every day - of writing anything. She is about to start writing every day for 30 days and one of the struggles she will have is to not edit as she goes. To not go for perfection - instead to just write.

I heard an interview a couple days ago and it was brought up how children are so much more creative than adults. Now I get that this is a mass generalization and I know some pretty creative adults. However, I think that there is the ring of truth to the statement. It's because kids aren't yet overly critical of their work. They draw, paint, write with reckless abandon. For joy. For the sheer fun of it. We lose that as adults.

So I'm inspired. I am going to start painting again. Daily. My goal is to spend this weekend creating a spot for it - & my discipline will be to just put brush to canvas every single day.

2009-03-31T11:45:00.000-07:00

I listen to CBC radio. A lot. One of my favorite shows is on at 10 a.m. "Q" with Gian Ghomeshi. Love it.

Today's show was my dream show. Almost perfection. It started with an interview with Yoko Ono. She talked about her "Bed-In" for peace with John Lennon and about her activism through her art. She is a visual artist - certainly outside the box - but I really enjoyed her perspective. Odd as it was.

Then it was followed up with an even better interview. Bruce Cockburn. Who also played live. It was amazing. Awe inspiring. I forgot how much I enjoy him and his music. He is articulate, thoughtful, edgy. His music settles and stirs me at the same time.

2009-03-27T08:47:00.000-07:00

So last night was my first evening of volunteering at Teen Challenge Ladies Centre. It's pretty laid back for me because the girls at the house have a pretty tight schedule. I just have to be a presence.

I learned a few things last night.

One, I have a pretty darn good life. I was raised in a family who loved me unconditionally, who provided for me physically, who encouraged me. I now have a husband who loves me, children who are unbelievably wonderful, a sister who is my closest and dearest friend and I have really good friends that I can count on.

Two, I don't prioritize well. By that I mean I seem to spend more time doing the things that aren't that important and ignoring the things that are. I seem to get caught up in the doing - and forget the being.

Three, people's value can never be judged by other people. We just aren't capable. We look at people who are broken - the addicted, the mentally ill, the emotionally unstable - and we see them as no longer of value. What can they do for the betterment of society?? But we are so wrong. I met some girls last night who were so broken. They struggle with addiction and all that goes along with it. They have suffered abuse and in their addictions,they have been the abusers. But in their pain, in their addictions, in their sufferings, God saw more. God saw them as beautiful children that He created and that He loves. They are all beginning to understand what it is to be valued. They are experiencing a love like no other and that is helping them to beat their addictions.

These girls are healthy are whole and are learning. They are changing physically, emotionally and spiritually. They are becoming what they were created for.

And now we are beginning to see what God saw all along.

2009-03-23T09:04:00.000-07:00

I realize it has been a while since that last post.

Truth is - we had a family vacation. Just to Vancouver - so it's not like we traveled far and saw things we've never seen before. But it was SO good to be away - just us. We stayed right downtown so we could walk pretty much everywhere we needed to go. And yes, we had rain gear. We spent a day at Granville Island and a day at the Vancouver Art gallery. Some time shopping, watching movies, checked out some of the more interesting architecture(like the public library). We relaxed and laughed and made memories. Just what a vacation should be.

One thing I noticed about the city is that it has an uncanny ability to make you feel discontent. Especially being downtown. My clothes/shoes/hairstyle weren't quite up to snuff. Neither were my home finishings or even our car. Truly Truly I really don't have any hang ups about any of that stuff. I love who I am and I love our home. It was just interesting to walk around and find myself wanting... just wanting...

So, back to my personal quest for fulfillment. Well, I have a possible job - a housecleaning job that will be a few flexible hours and some vacation money. And I am also about to start volunteering at the Teen Challenge Ladies Center in Abbotsford one evening a week. I am very very excited. It is a home made up of ten young ladies who have gone through detox and are at varying stages of their year long stay in the Teen Challenge Drug and Alcohol Recovery Program. I basically get to go and eat dinner,hang out, and tuck them into bed. I get to love these ladies, who for a host of reasons, are struggling with addiction but are working hard at getting their life back on track. What a gift.

2009-03-05T12:33:00.000-08:00

Just like the day after graduation.... the world is your oyster, limitless options, the feeling you could do anything and that anything was possible. Just like that - except different. Back then, when I looked to the future it was endless. I couldn't wait to see what hid behind every corner and the adventures that were just waiting for me. These days I don't see the future quite so endless and I smile when I think back and recall those hidden surprises and adventures. I don't long for them quite like I used to.

Well, it isn't the day after graduation and I'm no longer that wide eyed, somewhat naive 17 year old with no money but lots of hope. Well, I guess I've still got no money and perhaps hope tempered with caution. But I am at a place where I'm looking toward the future. Again. Things have changed for me. My days are no longer spent schooling the girls. They are off in public school, making friends, building lives. Having fun. I love it. I love it for them.

But me. Hmm... well, I'm at a new place. I suppose you could say I have options - with a few limitations attached. I want to do something of value. I want to earn some money. I want to find fulfillment.

Am I asking to much?

2009-02-17T08:57:00.000-08:00

From personal experience I can tell you that our BC Paramedics are a group of highly trained and amazing people. Their job is to walk into emergency situations, assess it, and save lives. And they do. Theirs is a critical, underpaid and underfunded job. There has been much in the news of late as paramedics protest and raise awareness for the ridiculous conditions that they work in.

I am fully aware we are in a recession. In the budget speech later today the rumour is that there will be lots of cuts but NOT in education and health care. I would hope that bodes well for them. Our health care cannot function without these men and women. period.

I fully support their efforts for more pay and funding to keep their services functioning at optimal levels.

2009-02-13T09:07:00.000-08:00

I don't know that I've ever seen such a miracle. A true blue WOW. Our friends dad was diagnosed with a tumor on his pancreas. About 2 cm x 2.5 cm. The ultrasound showed that it was stage 2 pancreatic cancer. Not good.

The next day the CT scan showed nothing. No tumor, no cancer. No, I'm not kidding. Now, he is still in some pain, he still has something going on - but there is no tumor.

It is so easy to see God as 'out there'. A distant entity who perhaps (if we believe the Bible) did some pretty cool things a long time ago. But we still have a God who enters into our lives. He still walks with us, he still heals.

I don't understand it. It is totally illogical and it's hard not to over-think it and try to figure it out. So, I'm just going to have the faith of a child and smile big and say thanks. A humble and grateful thank you.

2009-02-08T15:59:00.000-08:00

Sometimes it stinks to get older.

Don't get me wrong - most of the time I love the age I'm at. Whatever that age is. I've loved being 26 as much as 33 and I am thoroughly loving 44. When I listen to my daughter and her friends philosophize about their lives at age 14, you can just trust me when I say I don't miss being a teen. I've never minded growing up and getting older.

But sometimes it's just hard.

In the last five years we have buried both of my husband's parents. We know what it is to walk through the suffering of illness and sorrow with friends and family. We take on these grown up things - things that rarely, if ever crossed our path as young people. I certainly never worried about death or sickness. I never worried about accidents or random acts of violence.

My carefree days are certainly not behind me. In many ways I feel freer now than I did even 10 years ago. I suppose that the weight has just shifted - the things we are faced with now are a little more serious than those in our youth and we've had time to build deeper relationships with people and so feel the weight of their loads as well.

I am now of an age where it is much more a reality to bury people we care about or see friends dealing with illness, serious illness, in their own families. And that is just difficult. It makes me feel very much like a grown up.

I know that this is the journey of all - joy and sorrow, pleasure and pain. And one is richer because of the other. In fact I don't know that we would recognize true joy without knowing real sorrow. Would I realize that vastness of the feast if I had never experienced the emptiness of hunger?

Probably not.

2009-01-27T09:41:00.000-08:00

I just finished reading a book "Succulent Wild Woman" by Sark. Very fun, very outside the box. I will recommend it to any woman who wants to chuckle and feel challenged to throw away a few inhibitions. This is a quote from near the beginning of the book - I'm taking it as a challenge - and encouraging you all to "LIVE OUT LOUD".

“If you ask me what I came to do in this world, I, an artist, I will answer you: "I am here to live out loud”
-Emile Zola

2009-01-23T10:28:00.000-08:00

Occasionally I click around onto links to blogs that I find on other friends blogs. Does that actually make sense? I was clicking and scanning posts when I read this challenge. Click on your pics folder on your computer, click on the fifth file and then the fifth picture. So I did. This is what I found.

It is from my sister and I's wedding back in 1992 - she was a little tired after the rehearsal.

2009-01-20T09:43:00.000-08:00

I watched the swearing in of the 44th President of the United States this morning.

Not something I would normally do...but this was history and I couldn't miss it. I think he gave a sober speech, a wise speech. One that offered hope, but recognized that it will take work. Serious work. I think he fully realizes the weight of power that now rests on his shoulders.

I have read some negatives about this inauguration. The cost, the waste, the choice of people asked to pray. I find that sad. I see all the pomp and ceremony totally and completely appropriate and necessary. This is history. And this man deserves to be honoured as the choice of the American People to hold the most important office in the world.

I am excited for President Obama and his family, I am excited for America and her people. He will do many things through the next four years that will probably disappoint me, things that I will profoundly disagree with.

But still...I am looking forward, with anticipation and hope, to an interesting future.

2009-01-07T09:21:00.000-08:00

Life is funny sometimes. And sometimes it is not.

I am amazed at how easy it is to be perfectly content and peaceful with my world in one moment and so utterly inwardly chaotic the next. Maybe that's the human condition. Never quite right - closer some times than others but knowing that we were created and designed for something that we just can't quite get to. Hmmm...seems I'm a feeling a little philosophical today.

January is full of new beginnings. I have no resolutions this year. Right now my goal is to get through Jan 9 (my 2 year anniversary of the wind thang) with Reid gone to see the Canucks game and the girls and I having our own little party. Lofty goal, I know. I'm going to start looking for part time work. Not sure what to do there but I need to contribute a little bit financially to our family. I am at a loss of what to do but I'm going to be open to whatever. We are also calling this "The Year of living Healthy". As a family we are (actually have been for a while) changing habits and getting healthier - not just physically, but working on our mental and spiritual health as well.

So maybe those are resolutions. I resolve to party with my girls on Jan. 9, I resolve to find work, and I resolve to be healthy - physically, mentally, spiritually.

2009-01-05T08:04:00.000-08:00

As I sit here and write - my kids are snuggled in the living room reading. They are bouncing for joy because school was canceled. It's funny that they've had a couple weeks off - planned vacation - but this feels so much more exciting! I guess because it was a bonus - something unplanned and unexpected. All the really spectacular things in life seem to be those unexpected and unplanned things...

Christmas was, as always, perfect. The snow was falling on Christmas eve as our family made their way over to our house for our maritime tradition of seafood chowder - The town oh so quiet and peaceful. Christmas morning - Santa brought Rock Band for Wii - which can I just say is AWESOME! We walked over to my sisters for an amazing breakfast and then down to my parents for the gift opening. With 6 girls you might think it's a bit nuts - but they open one at a time, pause to examine and thank and enjoy the moments that pass. I think everyone had an amazing day - the only thing that would have made the season absolutely perfect would have been my brother and his son there. I think my parents felt the hole. But laughter and joy overflowed and we had a blast.

New Years eve found us with some good friends, playing Rock band and other games. As we toasted to the New Year we each found ourselves feeling overwhelmingly grateful for all that we have. Family, friends that are as close as family, health... none of us are hungry or jobless. None of us have to carry our loads alone. What a gift.

Our annual New Years Day Polar Bear Swim was more a roll on the ice as the lake was frozen over. Quite funny actually...Phoebe waded in to her ankles and then everyone ran to the hot tub! It was a nice time sitting in a beautiful home, overlooking Kawkawa Lake as the snow fell.

Maybe this snow day is a reminder. Maybe it is in the unplanned and the unexpected that the true joy is found. Maybe we need to spend the year looking not for the usual same old same old...maybe we need shake our routine up and embrace the surprises that each day holds.

2008-12-22T10:02:00.000-08:00

On the news last night was a story about the 3 top selling cd's this Christmas. Number one was the relatively new Coldplay but numbers 2 and 3 were old timers AC/DC and Metallica. The story went on to talk about how people are buying what they are calling "comfort music". Not that AC/DC has ever been classed as "comfort music" before! We are all drawn to the familiar. To that place where deep down we find something that we know. We're probably not even aware of it most of the time.

Earlier last night we went to the service at our Church. Each Christmas we have an evening where we bring our 'gifts' to Jesus. People sing or read, they do drama or share a memory. Last night was wonderful. I often go to services like this bracing myself to be bored. But not last night. It felt like a family gathering. Like a real community getting together and laughing about memories of Christmas' past, about very real experiences in the present and how in the midst of everything is this tiny baby who changed the world. The last to share their gifts were some singer/guitarists. As Harald softly strummed the guitar and sang and I felt myself pulled back in time from somewhere in the recesses of my brain. I remembered how my family would gather (aunts,uncles,cousins) in the summer in our backyard. There was always a guitar and eventually some would join in with singing - probably Johnny Cash. The family gathering was nothing like the worship gathering in its purpose - but I felt the familiar. I felt the same comfortable place of being with a group of people who mattered in my life and being in community with them.

Kinda like buying an old Metallica or AC/DC album. It's the comfort of being in a familiar place, a comfortable place where memories are made. It's probably especially important at Christmas and even moreso with the unfamiliar territory we are entering into globally.

2008-12-18T11:47:00.000-08:00

I've been writing. And no, I'm not a writer. But it's been a fun process. Here goes...
..............................................................
A child sat on a bench on the corner of a busy street waiting for her mom who was busy in one of the shops. She was tired of walking down the sidewalk, going into a store, getting too hot, taking off her layers, only to have to put them all on again a few minutes later. So she waited. Beside her was a kind looking gentleman. Considerably older than she - although she didn't know why she knew that. His face was without wrinkles, his hair held no grey. But his eyes. His eyes, even though they sparkled with generosity and kindness, his eyes she knew - were old.

They had greeted one another when the child had parked herself beside him, but now he turned to her and stared straight into her eyes. "Can you hear it?" he asked. "What? What do you hear?" the little girl asked looking around. She listened intently, concentrating to hear anything unusual. "Shhh. Listen." the man commanded. She listened. Quietly. She sat so still, with her eyes closed that you would have thought she'd fallen asleep. She heard people talking, some to each other, and some on their phones. She heard the cars drive by. She even heard the jingle of the bells on the store doors so that they would know if someone entered their shop. Occasionally she heard a Christmas carol or a dog bark but really, that was it. Nothing out of the ordinary and somehow she just knew that the sound this man was asking her about was special. And she heard nothing.

"No. I'm sorry sir, I don't hear anything." she finally answered. The man smiled, sort of. It was more a smile on one side and a frown on the other. He looked sad. Taking a deep breath, he looked at her again. "What do you see in my eyes?" he asked gently. The little girl leaned in close and stared. She looked unblinking into the deep, dark, old eyes of her bench companion. And she saw. Her eyes widened and she couldn't move. She could barely breath. She stared as hard as she could wishing the moment could last forever. Then blinking she turned away. Neither of them spoke for a long, long time. "I've never seen anything like that before." she said slowly. "Never. It was beautiful, it was sad, it wa...it was important wasn't it?" she finally asked turning to her friend. Now he smiled. "Nothing was ever so important. Now listen again" he said. Obediently she closed her eyes and listened. "Hmmm....well, I hear noise. Ummm... some carolers, some laughing, people talking - just the regular noise" she muttered disappointedly shrugging her shoulders. "Listen again" the man said softly. Taking a deep breath, she tried again. All at once the sounds flew at her - her mouth dropped, her eyes flew open and she whirled around to face the man. "There's more!" she cried. The man just smiled. "What do you hear?" She was talking quickly, trying to get all her words out at once. "I hear crying, oh, someone crying really hard, like their heart is breaking, I hear lonliness - at least I think it's lonliness. It feels like it is. And pain. I don't want to hear that. I think maybe its hunger and cold... " she clasped her hand over her heart. "What am I hearing?" she asked dazedly. The man moved a little closer to his young friend and whispered "What you hear, is what lies just beneath. You are hearing the true hearts of all the people passing us by. But there is one more sound you must listen for." The young girl strained to listen. And as she and the old man sat quietly on the bench, a smile slowly spread across her face. "Oh." was all she could choke out.

"What do you hear?" the man prodded. She turned to face him, tears streaming out of her eyes. "I hear 'joy to the world' - not the song - more like true joy....I'm not sure how I know that, but it's stronger and louder than anything else. It's... a baby? It..it's...I don't know what it is - wait, yes I do, it's a baby crying!" She covered her mouth with her hand. "It's Him isn't it? It's Jesus, the baby. I saw Him in your eyes. But I saw more than that. I saw Him being born with a bunch of animals, and I saw Him laughing and playing and I saw Him taking care of people and I even saw Him dying... " her words trailed off.

"I don't understand" she finally said. The man stretched out and sighed. "That's okay. Not many do. But once you hear that cry....well, now that YOU have heard that cry - you're different, aren't you." It wasn't really a question, more a statement of truth. "Now you see and hear what makes Christmas really something to celebrate. Now you understand that it all started with that cry - and the world will never be the same because of it."

The little girl sat quietly and thought about the strange words. "So," she said, "now that I have heard the cry of Jesus, I need to help others hear?" As she spoke she shifted to face the stranger but as she did, she realized she was alone. Before she could even understand what had happened, her mother called out to her that it was time to go.

But she never forgot the man or what she saw in his eyes that day, and in her own way, she worked hard at helping people hear more than the hustle and bustle around them. She helped people try to hear the hearts speaking beneath the surface and most importantly to hear the soft cry of the new babe found in a manger all those years ago.

And she herself, she never stopped listening.

2008-12-10T12:13:00.000-08:00

In the midst of the crazy stuff of life - there are gifts. Moments, seconds even, of clarity. Just enough so that you can carry on with fresh perspective. December is always busy. For everyone. Christmas parties, family get-togethers, band concerts, recitals, school assemblies. It just is full. And they are all good and fun. Just tiring.

So in the middle of me feeling so tired - so busy with the month of December, I received a little gift in the form of a reminder. Our friend went in for emergency surgery to have her very infected appendix removed. She was in serious and excruciating pain. It was a little worrisome as it took some time to diagnose. It is just difficult to see someone that you care about be in that much pain. It was like hitting the "pause" button. Suddenly comes focus. Ah, these things that take up space on my calendar, that have me rushing to and fro, they will pass. They aren't really so bad.

Because in the end I have family - amazing family - that I love and who love me back. I have friends that are true and faithful. That I love and who love me back. I have a faith in a God who I love - and who loves me back - So much so, that I celebrate His birth in just a couple weeks.

My life, be it ever so busy, is wonderful. It is rich and full. I am blessed, truly.

2008-12-05T08:33:00.000-08:00

Mr. Stephen Harper: arrogant...smarmy even

Coalition: incompetent, ignorant buffoons

Politics in Canada: Outrageous, ridiculous

Democracy in Canada: Undermined

....and who ever heard of the word "pirogue" before this gong show anyway??

2008-12-01T09:04:00.000-08:00

We watched a documentary last night about the decline of "Mom & Pop" businesses across the USA. It wasn't one of the better documentaries I've watched but it did set me to thinking...

One of the loud and clear messages was that you can't compete when a large box store comes to town. WalMart being of course, the easiest target. When WalMart comes and sets up in your community things change for the other retailers in the area. One of the main arguments from the WalMart execs interviewed was that it is a free and open market and part of that freedom means that people can shop where they please. So if they choose WalMart over smaller, usually more expensive stores, then that is their right. As town councils across the US move to block large big box stores from being able to come into their areas - WalMart sees it as a slight against the fundamental right of Americans to choose.

As a consumer I think it is important that we educate ourselves. What is the true cost of shopping cheap and big box? I believe it comes at a much higher cost than we realize. On the other hand, we would be hard pressed to support only our local businesses. There is little selection and generally yes, it is more expensive. And we just can't afford it.

As a family we have made some decisions though. We have been to WalMart probably twice in the last 5 years. We have many reasons for not supporting them but I certainly understand why people love it. We are trying to buy what we can locally. We support the local theatre, local coffee shops, local pharmacy, local mechanic, local video store. We do what we can.

I think that this issue is once again one of those issues where "thinking" is the key. We blindly shop and consume. It is time once again to start THINKING about where we put our hard earned money.

2008-11-26T08:46:00.000-08:00

The word of the month is "revolution". Yah. Odd word to have bouncing around in my head as we prepare for the holidays. But it seems that everywhere I go, I circle around to this thought of revolution.

Dictionary definition: REVOLUTION: a sudden, complete or marked change in something.

In my conversations and readings I keep coming back to this. There is a problem with our economy. There is a problem in North America status quo culture. I just heard Jackson Katz, a lecturer/author/activist speak yesterday, and he was fascinating and passionate about the violence in our culture - specifically violence by men, toward women. Google his name to find out more about him. As we prep for Christmas, I observe these sentimental and somewhat benign tributes to mark the birth of the Son of God.

And I guess this is where I end up. How is it that people (myself included) who profess to follow this man Jesus, do not appear to have had a revolution take place within them. How is it that we look, act, think like everyone else?

Look at some of what He said.

"If anyone would follow me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever want to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it." Luke 9:23

"Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. Give and it will be given to you.: Luke 6:37

"You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbour and hate your enemy. But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you..." Matthew 5:43

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: Love your neighbour as yourself." Matthew 22:37-39

How can we read these words and not recognize that if we lived these truths out in our lives we would be revolutionaries. We would be boat rockers and completely contrary to our culture.

Jesus called us to so much more than our comfortable North American lives.

2008-11-20T08:36:00.000-08:00

Don't you just wonder sometimes...

Lately I've been waking up every single morning with this thought. "The world's insane". Our radio comes on to CBC every morning about 6:28. We catch the tail end of the financial report and then the news. For the last month or so, it has been all about the global financial crisis and the economy. Understandable. This is pretty huge stuff. I feel pretty small and insignificant when the powers that be toss around numbers in the Billions. Billions.

For the most part, we've been shielded.

And then it began. First some layoffs in Nestle Guelph. Then a whack at the plant in Hope and Chilliwack. And then the second batch. Yesterday, another 50 in Guelph. And this time it was painful. This time it was people that Reid knew. Suddenly the numbers have faces and it begins to hurt.

Two thoughts as I finish up. One...read the book "The Shock Doctrine" by Naomi Klein. She is a journalist, author and film maker. If you want to understand the history of economics - specifically capitalism. Read it. But I will warn you. I found many of the stories and data difficult. As in, so disturbing it occasionally kept me awake at night. People in general, are a greedy bunch and greed drives people to do some shocking things.

Final thought. I'm also reading a book called "Jesus for President" by Shane Claiborne. Interesting in a different kind of way. But he brings up some of God's economic policies established in the Old Testament. How's this? Work hard and then rest every 7th day. And every 7th YEAR - take the whole thing off - yup, the whole year. During this year long break, all food that keeps growing in the fields is available for the taking by hungry/poor families. Debt that anyone had from the past 6 years was erased. Imagine how that would keep the balance of rich and poor. Imagine poverty virtually erased. BUT then! There is one more - every 49th or 50th year (70x7) was deemed Jubilee. During this year debt was forgiven, encumbered or forfeited land was returned to the original owners and slaves were set free. Claiborne refers to it as "a regularly scheduled revolution." Radical yes. But think about it...work hard, plan ahead - and then enjoy! Party! Celebrate! And don't do it alone. Everyone celebrate. Rich, poor and everyone in between.

Now there's some interesting economic ideas.

2008-11-15T08:20:00.000-08:00

So election time rolls around again. Municipal this time. Sadly, we have no "Barak" in our municipal elections - shoot, we don't even have a John McCain!

I will go cast my ballot. But I will do so with the dream that one day - one day, I will cast a vote for change. For vision. For leadership. For enthusiasm.

Today, I will simply be voting for those who I think will earnestly try to keep Hope somewhat on track until the next election time.

Ah well...

2008-11-13T11:38:00.000-08:00

It's been quite a ride. We had a wicked virus on our computer that resulted in many days of Reid having to re-install and rebuild from the ground up. BUT it is done and for the time being - we are happy.

Each year on Remembrance Day we go down to the Cenotaph in town for the ceremonies. Each year I am conflicted. I am a pacifist. Is my presence there taken to mean I am in support of military action? In the end, respect for those who march in their aging uniforms, gratitude for my country wins out - & I stand proudly among those honouring our veterans. This year was unique. Reid's mom passed away this past year and both his parents served in WWII. Reid laid a wreath in honour of his parents. It was beautiful, touching and very meaningful for him. My sister generously created it and on the card she wrote "Charles and Kathleen Nickerson - who loved both God and country." And yes they really did. Their time in service to their country profoundly changed them. It affected them for the next 50 plus years of their lives. They never, not for one second, forgot what they saw, what they were a part of. And they maintained many of the relationships that they formed during the war. Right up until the end.

I suppose I'm rambling. But this year, as we stood in the pouring rain and listened and prayed - as I reflected on the millions of lives that were never the same following all the wars over the years, as I remembered Reid's parents....I fall to my knees and ask that God forgive the evil that causes the wickedness of war, and humbly ask Him for peace.

Just peace.

2008-11-05T08:37:00.000-08:00

Obama.

History is made.

2008-11-04T08:28:00.000-08:00

Well today is the day. Election day in the United States. It's been a long time coming. Come tomorrow we should know who the people have chosen to lead them for the next four years. I confess I am feeling edgy because while all indicators are that Mr. Obama will win - you just never know. My brother-in-law, who is an American wrote a lengthy and challenging post about his thoughts on American politics. I just grabbed one of his last lines because it echoes my own heart. Regardless of who is sitting in the White House tomorrow and for the next four years - it is God who is in control. It is He and He alone who brings change.

... Bottom line is that the hope for the world is neither Barak Obama nor John McCain. As much as it may pain us to say it, it’s not the United States of America, Canada, or even freedom. It’s Jesus. And if we take the time to read what He says in the gospels…and really wrestle with how we live that out, we begin to be used by the Holy Spirit to change hearts. And that’s what I want to give my life to. ~Jeff Kuhn

2008-10-30T10:26:00.000-07:00

"Life in community is no less than a necessity for us, an inescapable 'must'... all life created by God exists in communal order and works toward community."

This quote is from a fellow named Eberhard Arnold. Fairly radical stuff if taken literally. I've been thinking lately about this idea: I am my brothers keeper. I am my sisters keeper...

What might that look like in my life...

2008-10-28T08:37:00.000-07:00

I was talking with a friend recently and reading her blog where she has made a list of "things I want to be involved in". I am now pondering and thinking about what would be on my list. What would I include? What would I chuck out? It's a good exercise. Like making positive affirmations. I will post my list when I come up with it.

The photo is a picture of the view we enjoyed just before dinner at an eco lodge called "Hacienda San Lucas" in Honduras. A breathtaking appetizer.

2008-10-23T08:21:00.000-07:00

I answered a question in the comments part of a previous post. The question is really, can I be pro-life and pro-Obama. For some the answer would be no. And I certainly understand that. I just don't happen to be one of those. For the record, I am most certainly pro-life. And I support Mr. Obama for President of the U.S. Life for me is in the womb and outside as well. I'm not going to re-state what I posted. You can read it in the comments.

This article arrived in my inbox this morning. A little lengthy but worth the read.

Can you be pro-life and support Senator Obama? The answer - upon even a moment's reflection - is unequivocally yes.

Welcome to Pro-Life, Pro-Obama, an online resource, created by Pro-life supporters of Senator Barack Obama.

Barack Obama's life has been one dedicated in service to the needs of others.

We are all called to build a culture of life - but there's more to it than just hoping that the next Supreme Court justice somehow deals with Roe v. Wade. A bad economy is threatening to human life. Women facing the moral tragedy of abortion - are facing it, now, today - and they need a supportive community and tangible help, not condemnation.

As Ronald Reagan's legal counsel and as a dean and professor at Catholic University and Notre Dame, I have worked to put the law on the side of life where it belongs.

But after 35 years, a new approach is needed. Too many unborn lives are being lost as we wait for judges to get it right. Barack Obama's strengthening of support for prenatal care, health care, maternity leave, and adoption will make the difference. Studies confirm it.

We are but a few weeks away from a new beginning in America.

I am inspired by what Senator Obama calls "the promise of America -- the idea that we are responsible for ourselves, but that we also rise or fall as one nation in the fundamental belief that I am my brother's keeper; I am my sister's keeper. That's the promise we need to keep."

It is because of the hope of this promise, that I have written Can a Catholic Support Him? Asking the Big Question About Barack Obama. While especially aimed at Catholic citizens, the book and the material here are devoted to opening every heart and mind to the prospect of transcending the partisanship on these difficult issues.

That is the change we need right now. And it is within our grasp.

Thank you for visiting this site and we look forward to being in touch,

Douglas W. Kmiec

Douglas W. Kmiec holds the endowed chair in Constitutional Law at Pepperdine University. Prior to that, he was dean and St. Thomas More Professor of Law at Catholic University of America in Washington, DC. He also served as Assistant Attorney General in the Office of Legal Counsel under Presidents Ronald Reagan and George H.W. Bush.

2008-10-21T08:39:00.000-07:00

I am thinking that this is a day for musings... I have been painting the interior of my house and as it is mindless work - for the most part - it gives lots of time for the mind to wander. And my mind wanders.

I've been circling around this idea of thinking critically and how this skill seems to be one that is rare. People just don't seem to want to think through things, they don't want to wrestle with the preconceived notions that we all frankly, have and possibly have to change their minds.

Just to explain my thoughts on this - I have been reading what some conservatives (ie: Republicans) have been saying about Mr. Obama. It seems it isn't enough just to say that politically they disagree. I have been reading blurbs from ladies (who seem pretty normal lovely mom type people!) who are comparing Obama with Hitler, who are entertaining the idea that he may be the antichrist, who honestly believe misquotes and half-quotes taken out of context that say he has connections with terrorists. Now I have no issues with aligning yourself politically with Obama or McCain or Steven Harper or Jack Layton. We all hold fast to different things. For this I am thankful.

I suppose I'm just wondering when so many of us stopped really truly thinking about the information offered to us and asking ourselves those critical questions.

Just thinking out loud....

2008-10-15T09:05:00.000-07:00

So. Same old, same old. Conservative Minority. I would be surprised if anything other than this result happened. and I think the same of most people. This was an election that was completely, from beginning to end, uninspired.

Steven Harper gave a great speech last night. Really good speech. In it he was gracious and positive toward both Stephan Dion and Jack Layton. He recognized that there must be a stronger commitment to work together. They need to play nice. Every party must recognize that the majority of Canadians don't want to hear them constantly fight and squabble and accomplish nothing. There are things, important things, that must get done in Ottawa. And each party has some good things to put in the offering. A good plan is a good plan regardless of which party puts it forward. I have hope (not much but a little) that Mr. Harper meant what he said. That maybe he will try to work with the Liberals and NDP in creating a strong Canada.

I guess we'll see.

2008-10-07T09:09:00.000-07:00

Two things. Wait...no, Three things.

First, my prerogative to change my mind. I have decided to cast my vote strategically. In my riding,Chuck Strahl of the Conservatives is the candidate. and although I am not Conservative - I like him. I always have. If I thought he needed my vote to win - I'd give it to him. But he will win - probably with a landslide, as usual. So I will end up casting my ballot Liberal - even though I don't know the candidate. But really, I want the liberals in opposition and the conservatives in a minority. At least until we are through this economic crisis. This voting thing is tiring. *sigh*

Second, wow - heckuvawindstorm last night!! Everyone was in our bed by about 4:30 a.m. and by 5 a.m. we dragged in a mattress for the floor so we could at least sleep slightly comfortably. The kids anyway. Me? Wide awake. Praying my heart would settle down and the sweats would stop. It ticks me off that my body still responds so acutely. We lost a beautiful apple tree in this storm.

And finally...and perhaps most important. My baby turned 12. She's been a gift to this family right from her first breath.

2008-10-06T09:02:00.000-07:00

A few more photos of our trip. The one of Reid, Jeff and Dad (& also our driver Ronaldo) is of them just before they set off on "Cables Extremos" in a National Park just out of Panajachel. Six zip lines, that cover over 350 meter at heights of 175 meters. Really fast, really high. I can't believe my dad did it. But he did and they all loved the experience. The rest of us enjoyed that antics of the wild monkeys.
The Lake is Lago Atitlan - a lake surrounded by three live volcanos - it was recently voted on the new seven wonders of the world.
The kids are from one of the schools - the boys in the cool outfits are dressed for National Independence Day.

2008-10-03T09:21:00.000-07:00

Watch a debate last night? From what I'm reading most people flipped between our own Federal Debate and the Vice Presidential Debate in the United States. I must confess I would have been one of those people - except we don't have cable and my only choice is the good old CBC, which of course, runs only our Canadian Debate.

I watched with Caris. Who was very interested. She was hoping for a clear laying out of what each party stands for. She was fascinated in how it unfolded. I enjoyed the debate for the most part. I was beyond impressed with Elizabeth May from the Green Party. She's feisty and intelligent and well spoken. Jack Layton from the NDP did what he always does which is talk loudly and grandly and with great confidence. And as much as I lean NDP (okay, REALLY lean) on a Provincial level - it's just not clicking for me on a National level. I went into this debate really hoping that Stephan Dion would pull out something that resonated in me. Some personality perhaps. Alas, I just cannot see him leading. He is earnest and sincere and I'm not sure - lacking maybe? some inner leadership quality that rallies and inspires people. I just wanted a glimmer - it's not like I was looking for a Barack Obama - but I caught sight of nothing in him. I watched Steven Harper - He was totally and wholly unappealing. It certainly looks like he will be the next Prime Minister - which I suppose is fine because the reality is - little changes regardless of who is in power. I was telling Caris that I will cast my vote for Opposition and with my conscience.

Which looks like I'll be heading Green this year.

2008-10-02T08:39:00.001-07:00

It wasn't supposed to be this way.

I thought I'd return from our trip to Guatemala refreshed, renewed, rejuvenated. and I suppose I was for the first week. I mean hey, I'm starting this brand new chapter in my life...both kids in school full time, which translates to days to fill with, with, well - now you see my problem. Fill with what? I want to fill my days with things that are of value to me. Things that need doing - yes, but also those things that will satisfy me on a deeper, more spiritual level. While I ponder those slightly huge questions I'm going to begin by painting the inside of my house. Mindless work that I actually do enjoy. Lots of time to listen to CBC radio and plan my next step.

Of course I never counted on the unexpected. Like this most wicked cold I've been saddled with. It began yesterday and today has grown to most mammoth proportions. I feel cranky. I feel whiny.

But all of this pales. Totally pales when I think of my dear sweet friends Terry & Juanita. And I do think of them constantly through the day. The Stauffers are mourning their 14 yr old daughter Emily who was murdered on Sat. night. I'm still broken for them. Broken for them - and so grateful as I look in my kitchen at lunch time and watch a pile of 14 yr olds as they chat, laugh and generally be loud.

I'm reminded acutely now, in that perspective that only tragedy brings, that I am beyond blessed to have Caris, and her dearest friends Becca, Rachel and Frankie. All 14 and very much alive.

And blessing lives all around them.

2008-09-29T08:31:00.000-07:00

Today my heart is crying for some very good old friends. Terry & Juanita Stauffer suffered a loss no parent should on Saturday. If you've seen the news you may have come across the murder of a lovely 14 yr old girl from Edson, Alberta. Her name was Emily Stauffer and she was their daughter.

It is inconceivable for me to consider their pain and grief right now. But we can all pray.

2008-09-22T09:30:00.000-07:00

A few more photos...I threw in the couple of us poolside to be fair!! We were able to spend a few afternoons at the hotel where my parents stayed for a week. We were in the lap of luxury and we thoroughly enjoyed it. It made the contrast of lifestyles all the more startling.

On another note...Phoebe is, as I type, spending her first full day in public school. For many reasons we decided to send her to Silver Creek School for grade 7. She is very excited and a little bit nervous. I have mixed feelings. It's like I'm sending my baby to Kindergarten for the first time. *sigh*

2008-09-20T10:06:00.000-07:00

We are home. With some mixed feeling I might add. I'm thrilled to be home, relaxed in my own space, with the people and things I love nearby. It is nice to be surrounded with the familiar. But oh it was hard to leave.

I have a million stories in my heart and I'm not sure that I'd be able to translate that into the written word. We'll see. Each night before bed we went through everyone and did a "Best/Worst". So maybe that's where I'll begin...

WORST: ummmm.... the ride to the Volcano - I'll expand a little here. No road in Guatemala is straight or flat. The whole country is a mountain and so it is a ride filled with ups (as in WAY up) and downs and switchbacks. Our ride to the volcano was with a young macho driver, who, even though we told him that we get sick on the twists and turns, chose to speed up as we went around corners.....on the side of a mountain......5000 feet up......with NO guard rails. After the road ended, we went another 45 min. on a gravel road with pot holes bigger than our vehicle, mud and yes, more twists and turns. All the while we are listening to some horrible spanish rap - the same song over and over. Later Jeff, who understood the lyrics to the song, told us it was a song about "dancing in the fires of the volcano, dancing with Satan in the fires of lava..." over and over. Can I just say ick?

BEST: Okay, almost everything else! Honest. I guess if I was very specific it would be meeting our sponsored child. What an honour for us. We actually loved every visit. The kids, the families - they live in extreme poverty. But they were not ashamed. Not the way we would be. They loved that we would bother to come see them. For the Guatemalan culture - people are important. Relationships are important. Not the stuff that does or doesn't surround them. That said, it was hard to absorb the poverty. Mud/dirt floors. No running water. No electricity. Beds that were at best a raised board with a mat.

We took over a 1000 pics. Literally. I'll try to post a few over the next little while. We'll start with our Sponsor child and his sisters. His name is Dani. And he's 6 years old. His oldest sister cares for the family and no longer goes to school. The middle sister is also sponsored. So between her and Dani, they are provided with education (all the way through college should they want), a big healthy meal and medical attention. The whole family benefits. $34.00 per month to change this lovely family.

What a gift for us.

2008-09-09T09:08:00.000-07:00

Time for a confession. I did not climb the volcano. I had a horrifying ride in a van all the way up to 6000 feet - and when I got out of the van, shaky legs and all, I had trouble breathing. I have asthma and let's just say that hiking up even higher was not an option. The girls went up and there is quite a story to tell but it's for later. Suffice it to say that it is a Latin American custom to not quite tell the truth. A short 10 minute hike translates to 1 1/2 hrs straight up on loose lava. Crazy.
Anyway. No complaining here. I love this trip - I'm seeing things that are going to take me quite awhile to express. Some beautiful, some heartbreaking, some encouraging and uplifting, some breathtakingly sorrowful.

Break is almost over. Hasta luego.

2008-09-04T12:53:00.000-07:00

okay,,,,very brief update. excuse the spelling - the keyboard is a tad different. I'm about to hike up a volcano. yes. a live volcano. and yes, i'm very nervous. spanish classes are difficult. it's a beautiful but challenging language. i can't yet put into words our wkd in honduras and the city where we've been this week, antigua, guatemala. it is a far cry from home. i love so very many things.

2008-08-27T12:50:00.000-07:00

The following link will take you to the place we are going to have our first meal in Honduras - it'll be Friday night. We will be meeting Reid's cousin for the first time and it is ran by a good friend of hers. How blessed are we!?!

http://www.haciendasanlucas.com/

Talk to you in three weeks!

MAVIS: Thank you from the bottom of my heart for the phone message! We will enjoy ourselves and have many stories when we return.

2008-08-20T10:47:00.000-07:00

SEVEN MORE SLEEPS!!

No, relax, not until Christmas. You've got 132 days until then. Seven sleeps until we are on route to Guatemala. We've been so busy getting the last of the details finished up. I can hardly believe that we will be there soon. Reid & Caris are both away this week (Caris is at Camp Squeah in the pouring rain!!) and so Phoebe and I are both taking care of the million little things to be done.

We've finalized our plans. Want to hear?? Okay. We fly into Guatemala City Thursday evening and drive to Antigua. We'll meet our host family, and the next day we will hit the road and drive six hours to Copan, Honduras. We will spend the weekend there and Sunday head back to Antigua. We spend Mon - Fri there. Study Spanish 8 - 12 and then sight see and tour around for the rest of the day. The next Friday we travel again to a town called Panahachel which is on a beautiful lake. We spend 2 nights there and Sunday we head to Chichicastenanga where they have a huge Farmers Market. Back to Antigua for one more week of Spanish classes and then the following Friday we head out again to Tactic to visit some Missionaries that my sis & bro-in-law have worked with. We will visit their school, and homes. This will be the poorest area we will spend time in. Our family will have the honour of meeting our Sponsored Child Dani for the first time. We are so excited.

We are there until Wednesday when we will head back to Guat City to fly home on Thursday. *sigh*

One more bonus for this trip is that we will be meeting Reid's cousin for the first time. She is a story unto herself - I haven't got time to describe her just now but if you want to know more just google "jennifer casolo". She even has her own Wikipedia entry. I'm anticipating that she will be a highlight for Reid & I.

2008-08-08T08:26:00.000-07:00

I'm in that mood again. The mood that gets me thinking about how we've only got one go around on this earth. One life. Do the choices we make in lifestyle reflect that? I'm getting these thoughts...these ideas. Like,say we chucked it all. Well, not really chucked - more like sold it all. Everything. And bought a travel van (like the "great big rolling turd" in the movie RV - but smaller) or bought a cafe or coffee farm in Guatemala. What if we just did it. Risked the Western norm and did it.

I really want to set an example for our girls. Show them all that life can be. Choices. I guess that is what I'm thinking about. What we choose to do with our hours and days, how we choose to spend our money, who we choose to spend time with. Reid and I understand that our actions now will set the tone for what our girls do in the future. Family is important to us. We make an effort and priority to spend time with our family. We go out of our way to spend time with my parents (not that it's any great hardship - they are awesome!!) But I want them to understand that the things that crowd into their lives as they grow up - they are good but they aren't as important as they might think. I'd like to think that they will honour us the same way we have honoured their grandparents. Kind of that "Cat's in the Cradle" by Cat Stevens thing. So I suppose that I am thinking of daily choices as well as longer term life choices. I'm just thinking.

Letting my mind go.... isn't there just a part of you that says let's just do it. Let's see where we end up.

And then that reality thing gets in the way. Of course, reality can be altered...

2008-08-04T20:52:00.000-07:00

For the first time in many, many years I went hiking. Our family, along with my sister's family hit the trail and climbed to The Patch on Hope Mountain. I am in NO condition to hike - but I've been working hard to improve this body and it was time to push. My family was so encouraging and I have to admit that at this moment I feel really proud (I also feel like my legs are jello but let's not go there!). It was a great way to spend the day, enjoying creation and family.

Hope your BC Day was just as memorable.

2008-07-22T11:50:00.001-07:00

All the great things are simple...

Freedom
Justice
Honour
Mercy
Hope.

~Winston Churchill

2008-07-19T14:39:00.000-07:00

So, guess where we went Friday Night. No - not James Taylor, who was across the street and no, not Cirque de Soleil - who were just up the road. Yup. We were at the BC Lions football game. They played Winnipeg, they won and the game was followed by a tribute to Bob Ackles who recently passed away. I'll be honest and tell you that NONE of us know anything about the game. Well, nothing more that the absolute basics. But we walked in and sat down in amazing seats - so close we could see the players sweat - seriously. And we decided to be fans. So we cheered when everyone else did. We high fived our neighbours. We yelled and screamed. And we had a blast.

The tribute was great. I know very little about Mr. Ackles. But I know now that he was as regular a guy as you get, who started at the bottom as a waterboy and worked his way up. Way up. He's inspiring. His passion for his family and for football was obvious.

2008-07-08T14:46:00.000-07:00

Fourteen years of joy wrapped up in a little girl named Caris Lynn.

Happy Birthday.

2008-07-04T09:45:00.000-07:00

We are off for our first weekend of camping this summer. So excited!! Five families, a ton of camping gear, a gazillion kids and the open air! Who could ask for more?

...well, actually maybe some forecasted sunshine would be nice.

2008-06-30T08:51:00.000-07:00

2008-06-27T08:49:00.000-07:00

Today is the day. Yup. Today. My "niece" Heather is getting married tonight a 7:00 p.m. We are very thrilled for her. We like her husband to be very much.

I've spent the last 2 days decorating the Church Sanctuary and the gym for the big event. I can truly say I'm exhausted - but it really was so much fun. The sanctuary just turned out beautiful. Absolutely perfect. We brought the typical white lights and tulle - but combined it with some earthy elements like big logs of driftwood and bamboo screens. It just works and I couldn't be happier. I love it when the picture in your mind translates out into real life.

When I first met Heather she was a withdrawn, quiet girl scared because she was losing her mom to cancer and moving in with a family she didn't know at all. She's come a long way. She has graduated High School, done a year of Bible School, worked hard and managed a deli, travelled to Mexico, and is now completing her Early Childhood Education certificate.

We are very proud of the woman she has become.

2008-06-24T08:28:00.000-07:00

This book was released ages ago and I remember hearing the buzz surrounding it. Somehow it never made it onto my reading list. I finally picked it up on Friday night and read it start to finish that night. I think it was very timely for me - being in the process of working through my mother-in-laws death.

This is a great book. Well worth the very short amount of time to read it will take you to read it.

2008-06-17T12:23:00.000-07:00

So here is an old picture I found of Reid with his parents. I think it was taken the year we got engaged so 1991. It was the first time I met them. Reid's got a pretty swanky lookin' mullet there. Some 'twilight zone' trivia for you surrounding Reid's mom's death...
-she died exactly 4 years and 1 day after Reid's dad (I think she hung on that extra day for Reid & his brother to arrive)
-she died in exactly the same room as Reid's dad
-her funeral is exactly 4 years and 1 day after Reid's dad's.
-they were both 84

How's that for "things that make you say hmmmmmm....."

I included another picture - this one of my niece Kaitlyn. It is her birthday today - and we celebrate everything about her. There is no word to describe her better than the word "gentle". Kaitlyn is a gentle person. She is truly wonderful and we are so very grateful for her in our lives. Happy Birthday sweet girl.
p.s. You may notice that in the photo she's got a nose full of chocolate cake. That's what happens when you eat with no utensils! She may be gentle - but she's an awful lot of fun!

2008-06-15T09:34:00.000-07:00

Ever heard the expression "just in a nick of time"? Not sure where it came from but it certainly applies to Reid and his oldest brother Rick. They pulled out of the Halifax airport somewhere between 8 and 9 Sat. night and went straight to the hospital where Reid's mom is. They stayed with her until the wee hours - somewhere between 2 and 3 in the morning and at 6 a.m. she passed away.

It is sad. Of course it is sad. But it also is a relief. No sitting around waiting for something to happen that you have no control over. No wondering if there is that perfect thing to say, no more worrying about how much pain the woman you loved from birth is in. It is done and she is in better hands.

...aaagh the circle of life.

2008-06-13T09:04:00.000-07:00

We have just booked Reid on a flight to Nova Scotia for 6:30 a.m. on Saturday. He got the call telling us that his mom was "deteriorating rapidly" and the family was being "called home". So off he goes, along with his sibling. All five of them will be together for the first time in many years. Kind of sad that it takes something so tragic to draw everyone together.

Reid's mom is 84. She has had serious health issues for much of the last 6 or 7 years but right up until now, has been able to live at home. She's had a very good life. A husband who loved and supported her, five children who are wonderful, kind, caring individuals. Many grandchildren and even great-grandchildren.

But still. Reid is so very sad. Are you ever ready to say goodbye to a parent?

Think back over some of the memories you share with your family. Enjoy them. Don't have any regrets.

2008-06-09T11:23:00.000-07:00

These are the top 100 American movies. It might be fun to work through the list and see them all. Maybe. I've bolded the ones I've already seen. 42 out of 100. Not bad!

1. Citizen Kane, 1941
2. The Godfather, 1972
3. Casablanca, 1942
4. Raging Bull, 1980
5. Singin' in the Rain, 1952
6. Gone With the Wind, 1939
7. Lawrence of Arabia, 1962
8. Schindler's List, 1993
9. Vertigo, 1958
10. The Wizard of Oz, 1939
11. City Lights, 1931
12. The Searchers, 1956
13. Star Wars, 1977
14. Psycho, 1960
15. 2001: A Space Odyssey, 1968
16. Sunset Blvd., 1950
17. The Graduate, 1967
18. The General, 1927
19. On the Waterfront, 1954
20. It's a Wonderful Life, 1946
21. Chinatown, 1974
22. Some Like It Hot, 1959
23. The Grapes of Wrath, 1940
24. E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial, 1982
25. To Kill a Mockingbird, 1962
26. Mr. Smith Goes to Washington, 1939
27. High Noon, 1952
28. All About Eve, 1950
29. Double Indemnity, 1944
30. Apocalypse Now, 1979
31. The Maltese Falcon, 1941
32. The Godfather Part II, 1974
33. One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, 1975
34. Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, 1937
35. Annie Hall, 1977
36. The Bridge on the River Kwai, 1957
37. The Best Years of Our Lives, 1946
38. The Treasure of the Sierra Madre, 1948
39. Dr. Strangelove, 1964
40. The Sound of Music, 1965
41. King Kong, 1933
42. Bonnie and Clyde, 1967
43. Midnight Cowboy, 1969
44. The Philadelphia Story, 1940
45. Shane, 1953
46. It Happened One Night, 1934
47. A Streetcar Named Desire, 1951
48. Rear Window, 1954
49. Intolerance, 1916
50. The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring, 2001
51. West Side Story, 1961
52. Taxi Driver, 1976
53. The Deer Hunter, 1978
54. M-A-S-H, 1970
55. North by Northwest, 1959
56. Jaws, 1975
57. Rocky, 1976
58. The Gold Rush, 1925'
59. Nashville, 1975
60. Duck Soup, 1933
61. Sullivan's Travels, 1941
62. American Graffiti, 1973
63. Cabaret, 1972
64. Network, 1976
65. The African Queen, 1951
66. Raiders of the Lost Ark, 1981
67. Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?, 1966
68. Unforgiven, 1992
69. Tootsie, 1982
70. A Clockwork Orange, 1971
71. Saving Private Ryan, 1998
72. The Shawshank Redemption, 1994
73. Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, 1969
74. The Silence of the Lambs, 1991
75. In the Heat of the Night, 1967
76. Forrest Gump, 1994
77. All the President's Men, 1976
78. Modern Times, 1936
79. The Wild Bunch, 1969
80. The Apartment, 1960
81. Spartacus, 1960
82. Sunrise, 1927
83. Titanic, 1997
84. Easy Rider, 1969
85. A Night at the Opera, 1935
86. Platoon, 1986
87. 12 Angry Men, 1957
88. Bringing Up Baby, 1938
89. The Sixth Sense, 1999
90. Swing Time, 1936
91. Sophie's Choice, 1982
92. Goodfellas, 1990
93. The French Connection, 1971
94. Pulp Fiction, 1994
95. The Last Picture Show, 1971
96. Do the Right Thing, 1989
97. Blade Runner, 1982
98. Yankee Doodle Dandy, 1942
99. Toy Story, 1995
100. Ben-Hur, 1959

2008-06-03T08:23:00.000-07:00

Every few years or so someone inevitably asks the question...."if you could invite any three people over for dinner - who would you choose?" Well, interestingly I have 2 that have been on my list for always. They never change. And that third spot seems to change as my interests and attentions wander.
So, as always - John Lennon. When I met Jesus, for real, the truth of who He was resonated deep within me and I knew it was a perfect fit for me. John Lennon settles in me as well. His voice, his thoughts and his lyrics speak to me - and have since I was very young - and yes, I'm fully aware that I reject many of his philosophies. I don't have to agree with him to admire him or have him over for dinner. Of course, that being dead thing really gets in the way too.

Number 2 - as always is Mother Teresa. With her deep love and devotion combined with her sharp tongue and quick wit - I'd love to sit with her for an evening. Of course, she's got that dead problem too.

Number 3 - for now at least, is Noam Chomsky. I've read his stuff for a few years now and every time I read another book, I think how much I'd like to sit and talk with him. Noam is a called by the New York Times "...the most important intellectual alive". He is a professor of linguistics but he also challenges politics and the media. He is fascinating because he is so brilliant. AND he is still alive - although he is getting older....dinner should be soon!

What about you? Dead or alive - who would you like to have over for dinner conversation?

2008-05-29T13:16:00.001-07:00

This is a beautiful photo of my nieces and nephew. They take my breath away.

2008-05-23T10:23:00.001-07:00

I was asked recently if I could tell the story of my accident for some ladies in town. Because it was such a life changing experience for me - I said yes. But moments ago, as I sat at my computer and tried to articulate it...I realized it's going to be a little harder than I thought. On one level, it is a pretty straight-forward story. Girl sees wind, wind blows deck through front door, deck hits girl, girl gets hurt, girl recovers.

But I want to make sure I tell of all the miracles that occured that day. I want to make sure to share about all the people who did simple things - that turned out to be miraculous in the moment. There are so many seemingly unrelated threads that when joined together create a beautiful woven masterpiece.

...and that really is the story. How God takes obscure, oddly coloured, weak threads and transforms them into something beautiful. He takes us, as we are - and creates a thing of joy and beauty.

2008-05-16T12:31:00.000-07:00

A few more photos - including the girls with their new haircuts (okay so Phoebe had only about 14 strands cut!)

2008-05-16T12:16:00.000-07:00

It's a glorious day...the girls were snapping pics in the yard while I toiled in the garden...*sigh*... a perfect way to spend our 16th wedding anniversary.

2008-05-13T10:00:00.000-07:00

My friend La Vern sent me a great link.

www.storyofstuff.com -

go check out the video. It is 20 minutes long but so well worth the time. It's not designed to make you feel guilty - but to educate and to offer alternatives for our crazy and unsustainable lifestyle.

One of the most interesting bits of info I learned was in how we became such a consumer driven society in the first place. The host quotes Victor Lebow who was an economist after the war. His teaching changed everything...

Our enormously productive economy… demands that we make consumption our way of life, that we convert the buying and use of goods into rituals, that we seek our spiritual satisfaction, our ego satisfaction, in consumption… We need things consumed, burned up, worn out, replaced, and discarded at an ever increasing rate.
- Victor Lebow, 1955

and didn't we all just buy into this philosophy hook, line and sinker.

2008-05-11T17:54:00.000-07:00

And a Happy Mothers day to you all.

2008-05-04T21:05:00.000-07:00

So, at the end of this month my friend Lisa will be 40.

To celebrate we had a variety show Sunday afternoon. It featured everything from touching solos to a magic show to a couple dance routines. It even featured an air band performance of Quiet Riot's "C'mon feel the noise". Doesn't get much better. It was a great gathering of friends and family to celebrate.

Lisa is quite remarkable. Her life is marked by generosity and it was such a pleasure to give back just a little.

Happy Birthday.

2008-04-28T09:25:00.000-07:00

Yes I am home. A great time was had by all! Whistler is nothing like I remember. It's been about 16 years since I visited. Everything - from the drive up to the village itself is new. Wow.

I really enjoyed my day. I walked, watched, window shopped, read and rested. Just what the doctor ordered. Can I recommend it to everyone?! Just one day!

When we returned home, Reid's sister and her husband from Nova Scotia came for the weekend. Her husband came out for a work conference and they are making a holiday of it. It was great to see them. We had a beautiful day on Saturday and there is nothing better than showing off our town of Hope in the sunshine!

But all good things come to an end...so I am off to clean my kitchen, do a truck load of laundry and get ready for school.

DEEP THOUGHT OF THE DAY: (by Jack Handey)
If you are robbing a bank and your pants suddenly fall down, I think it's okay to laugh and to let the hostages laugh too. Because, come on, life is funny.

2008-04-21T12:38:00.000-07:00

Reid & I are hitting the road! Two nights at Whistler! We are very excited. Reid has to work but I...well, let's just say I get to spend my day doing ANYTHING I WANT!! Just hanging out, people watching, reading, walking...*sigh*.... I am so ready.

In a totally unrelated (random!) thought - I have been thinking about Mother Teresa the last couple days. Not sure why! Here's some wisdom from her...

Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person.

Everytime you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person,
a beautiful thing.

I do not pray for success, I ask for faithfulness.

If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each
other.

Intense love does not measure, it just gives.

She's got so many wise words....these are just the tip of the iceberg. But perhaps enough to think about for the time being.

2008-04-17T08:45:00.000-07:00

Last night's community meeting was, for the most part, a very useful meeting. It was an opportunity for Trustees, for educators, for students, for community members and for parents to come together and voice thoughts, ideas, concerns and excitment. I thought that, with the exception of one angry person, it was respectful and thoughtful.

I guess I want to be clear on a couple things. One, I am certainly not totally opposed to this venture. I can see where it has potential to be a great thing. I am not convinced that the HSS venue can accomodate the co-location idea - but I do see the merit in the idea being proposed.

Two, it would seem that many people are picking up on this "fear" point. Fear is really the wrong word here. Perhaps the problem is the limitations of words - I may talk a paragraph of concerns and yes, a point in that paragraph is related to the idea of my child's safety. But it is much more multi-faceted than straight fear. My inability to express the larger picture here probably contributes to this perception but hear me when I say - physical safety is a very minor point in this equation.

I am also not completely hung up on criminal record checks being done as a means to ensure safety of HSS students. A comment on my previous blog made me realize that it is difficult to explain fully thoughts and ideas in cyber-space! I don't think that having safety expectations reinforces stereotypes. But I do see the point being made. I don't think that if we brought UCFV students into HSS that it would be beneficial to have them all do record checks. To give some context to my train of thought, in a previous meeting, parents were told that UCFV students would have to go through some sort of screening process before they would be able to go to class at the HSS campus. What does that look like? Is that something that can REALLY be done? And is it something that should even be done??

If anything, I feel optimism after our meeting. I think that it was clear that everyone felt that this idea, no matter how good, may have been rushed and there needs to be more diaglogue. I think it was recognized that the process so far, has been flawed. It appears that this will be remedied. I think many very legitimate concerns were raised and I certainly hope they were heard. I think that in the world of academia - everything looks and sounds good on paper. The ideas of why this could be a good thing were certainly lovely. Idealistic even. I am just getting stuck in the reality thing. I want to see how this could play out in real life.

I hope they continue this discussion. Not just in terms of mandates and education ideals (and no, I'm not saying these don't have a place!) - but in terms of what it could really look like. Start laying out some concrete plans. And bring them to the public. Let's discuss them. Then go back - maybe re-work them - and bring them out again for discussion. I don't think that time should be considered - we need to give this all the time it needs.

The idea, and all the students affected are worth a good deal of time and effort.

2008-04-16T08:23:00.000-07:00

Can I rant? Just for a minute.....or two.

Tonight Reid & I will be attending a Community Meeting to be held our our High School to discuss the University College of the Fraser Valley and our Highschool joining together in a co-location agreement. In short, UCFV will move its classes and offices into our local HighSchool.

Like many of you, I discovered this co-location agreement only upon reading about it in our local newspaper. There was NO discussion about it with educators, parents or students. That in and of itself is apalling enough. The whole idea, while it may not be the worst thing to ever happen, raises many questions that need to be answered before entering into such an agreement. What will be done to ensure safety - am I really comfortable with my just turned 13 yr old walking the halls with adults who, as students, have no need for a criminal record check? Will adults pursuing entry level college courses really be comfortable in a highschool? Given the range of ages that will be attending classes - how much will that affect the quality of the highschool students' experience? What concerns were ever addressed by the Trustees? Why can't UCFV used the HSS facility after regular school hours? Was there input from teachers at HSS?

Of course these are just a few of many questions that need to be addressed.

And this doesn't even touch on the issue of what our elected officials have done. They made a very serious decision without ANY consultation. None. In fact, a friend attended one of the school board meetings and one of our trustees said that in expressing our (parental) concerns, we were making a 'mountain out of a molehill!" and worse yet it was her belief that in cases such as this, the board needs to make decisions for the public even if it means they "Take the pulic kicking and screaming!" WHAT??

So tonight we enter into our one chance for public debate. I'm SO looking forward to it.

2008-04-14T10:41:00.000-07:00

Simplicity of Character
is the natural result of profound thought.

~William Hazlitt (1778-1830)

2008-04-08T10:11:00.000-07:00

Reid & I watched the Michael Moore film "Sicko" last night. I have to admit that I am a fan of Michael Moore although I do understand why there are those who take exception to his style.

"Sicko" compares the American Health Care system with those of the so called Socialist systems found in Canada, Britain and France.

I was so grateful - hugely grateful - to be Canadian. I cannot believe that Americans are not protesting in massive outrage against the Health Care system in their country. I love being part of a country that values all human life. That the quality of my care is not subject to how wealthy I am. HealthCare should never be a choice that we have to make based on our bank accounts. Phoebe spent a week in the hospital when she was less than 6 months old. She had whooping cough. I think that event would have changed the course of our lives had we lived elsewhere. My niece had to have life saving surgery when she was days old. How different would her family's life be had they not been in Canada? Even my accident and all the tests and exams and therapy I needed as a result. I can't even imagine how we could have paid for it all. Even if we had health insurance (although, it would appear that Reid & I would not be eligible for insurance because of his high blood pressure and my heart problems!) we still would have wound up in debt.

It's a good watch. Entertaining, disturbing, thought provoking. I would encourage you to see it. It'll make for some great discussion.

2008-04-03T13:19:00.000-07:00

Moments ago I put down a book.

A beautiful and powerful book. I don't think that I could express to you the jumble of emotions I feel at this moment - and even if I could, I'm not sure I'd want to. What I do want is for you to read this book. Really.

The book is called "The Shack" by William P. Young.

2008-04-01T10:20:00.000-07:00

I'll be really honest - today I feel overwhelmed, profoundly and deeply sad. Even as I look outside and I see glorious mountains capped with snow, blue sky and spring flowers starting to bloom. So while MY world is beautiful and blessed - elsewhere it just ain't so.

Our world is so broken. Maybe I should stop listening to the news. But maybe it is important to have my heart break with the tragedy of the world. It started a couple days ago as I watched the frustration and irritation of the people of Zimbabwe as they wait for results from an election that, with each passing day, appears to be rigged. This morning I heard a radio documentary about babies in Kenya. Babies born of incest that are abandoned because of the deep rooted cultural belief that these babies are cursed and that they will bring death and destruction into any village that they are a part of. Incest and rape are a huge problem. Why? Because AIDS has left children vulnerable and open to abuse. Social agencies cannot keep up with the volume of babies in their care. And this is on top of children living with AIDS already in the care of agencies. These children are virtually un-adoptable so they will live and die in government run homes. This documentary was followed up by a story of the men who died off the coast of Newfoundland/Labrador. Lost at sea while being "rescued" by the Coast Guard. Four families forever changed. This all on top of Iraq and Afghanistan, of violence in Somalia and Tibet.

Our world is broken.

I don't necessarily want to be cheered up. I actually think it is a good thing to feel the weight of the world's woes on occasion. It keeps perspective for me. My life is not the norm for the majority of the world. It is easy to become self centered. So I guess I'll accept the sorrow of this day knowing my sorrow is nothing compared to the people who are enduring the pain directly.

2008-03-31T08:46:00.000-07:00

GOLDEN

They say that silence is golden. And I have to agree with them. Saturday night we participated in Earth Hour. And we thoroughly and completely enjoyed ourselves doing it. The event of course, received a great deal of negative press..."oh, they are just doing it for attention - it's nothing more than a publicity grab!" And well, to them I would just say that if headlines were the only reason for Earth Hour - that would be okay by me. I'm sure that neither organizer nor participant was under any grand illusions of changing the world forever with this schtick. I know that many large cities participated. I know that according to the CTV news, Vancouver saved enough to power 573 BC homes. I think that is pretty impressive.

But more impressive to me is what it was like for our family. We didn't just shut off our lights. We hit the main power breaker and cut off all electricity to the house. So with the click of a switch - there was complete silence. No furnace kicking in and out, no hum of the fridge or other appliance. Just complete and total silence. Even the kids noticed. We lit a fire in our fireplace, lit tons of candles (what would we do without those Ikea tea lites??), talked, told jokes and eventually pulled out a game. We left everything off for maybe 2 1/2 hours. It made for a peace filled evening. One of our girls commented that we should make this a Saturday night tradition. We are giving that some serious thought.

It was a worthy event - and not one cynic could point a finger at our family and sneer. I think it raised awareness in our family - and we weren't so naive heading in to the whole thing!

The experience bears repeating.

2008-03-28T08:01:00.000-07:00

EARTH HOUR!

Saturday at 8 p.m. is Earth Hour. For that one measly hour you are asked to turn off your power. No, I am pretty sure that the world won't be forever altered by the choice that people are making to kill the power for one hour. BUT I am sure that we will enjoy the experience, that it will be a catalyst for more discussion in our family and that we will have fun playing games by candlelight. I bet we keep the power off for quite a while.

We decided a while ago to try to make one change every month that would be environmentally friendly. We are walking to Church every Sunday - rain or shine. We have stopped using paper towel. The water never runs in our house, lights are not left on and new this month - no showers longer than 5 minutes. Less if possible. Growing up we had 5 people, one of those a serious jock, with one very small hot water tank. I believe that any shower we took was closer to 2 minutes. Five minutes is a piece of cake! Now we are fully aware that we aren't doing anything earth shattering. I know that climate change will not reverse itself because the Nickerson family is making these insignificant changes. But you know, like anything, it all begins somewhere - with one small step. Reid & I are becoming so much more aware.

And our girls...well, now they really could change the world.

2008-03-27T12:16:00.000-07:00

Here comes the bride....

Our niece Heather has just gone and gotten herself engaged. Wow. It's very exciting she and Darryl are going to be married on June 27th, 2008. Not much time to plan & prepare but really, why drag it out?!

So we are excited and so very happy for her. She deserves such joy.

2008-03-25T19:42:00.000-07:00

One of my favourite books just won an award. "Quaker Summer" by Lisa Samson won the Book of the Year award from Christianity Today. It is an excellent read and I HIGHLY recommend it. I ordered mine from our public Library so I know that it is easy to get your hands on a copy!

Check it out.

2008-03-23T22:03:00.000-07:00

He is risen!

He is risen indeed.

Today is a celebratory day - my absolute most favourite day of the year. There is nothing like Resurrection Day to get my blood flowing! My faith, for everything it looks like in day to day life, is rooted in the death and resurrection of Jesus.

Hallelujah.

2008-03-19T08:59:00.000-07:00

I have found it interesting watching the aftermath of Senator Obama's retiring pastor's sermons. I can't condone what he preached. But I think that Senator Obama's response was grace under fire. It was difficult, I'm sure, to stand up and make a response especially a response that deals with the issues raised. Nobody wants to talk about race relations. It is much easier to just pretend that the right thing was done in the '60's and everything is just fine now. Let's not bring it up again.

Isn't that just what we all do. If we don't talk about something - it isn't a problem. Or maybe it is wrong to even bring up certain subjects...those certain core beliefs that are so protected that to even bring them up for discussion is to question things that cannot be questioned.

I've had some interesting conversations with people lately. There are some questions being asked that really don't have easy answers - if they have answers at all. But does that mean that we quit asking? That we just let sleeping dogs lie and keep the status quo?

No. I say question away. Even if it means I lay awake thinking about it all night...

2008-03-11T14:26:00.000-07:00

We are leaving for Antigua, Guatemala on August 28. It can't come to soon for me - I am ready to go. So...specifically we are going to "Centro Linguistico Internacional" in Antigua which I'm told is one of the most 'storybook' cities in Guatemala. It is old and quaint and a little slice of the not-so-real world. Can't wait. We are going to be part of their "Learn Together" program which will allow for Reid, the girls & I all to have Spanish classes. Some individual instruction but for the most part we will learn together for approx. 4 hours per day. We will be living with a Guatemalan family for these two weeks which will hopefully force us to engage in conversation! What an adventure!

Caris will be missing the first 2 weeks of Grade 9. This fact bothered her and I guess as I watched her reaction to missing those weeks, I was bothered. Reid & I had to take her misgivings seriously but to be honest, I couldn't for the life of me see the issue! In the end we all agreed that 2 weeks of Grade 9 (frankly probably most of Grade 9!) will be a small and mostly insignificant blip in her life. A 3 three week adventure in Guatemala - will register a far bigger blip. She is excited. And has quickly been able to put everything into perspective. She's a wise 13 year old.

So it's time to start making lists. Lots of lists....

2008-03-10T08:31:00.000-07:00

This where we are heading! How amazing is that!!

I apologize (truly and from the bottom of my heart!) for not being more up to date in blog land. It's been a busy couple weeks. The kids had an Easter Musical last night. Phoebe had a speaking role and Caris was helping out with Girls Club. It was a good night - every parent there was beaming. I'm just so glad it's done!

Reid is off to Guelph this week. Yup. Guelph - the land of brrrrr and snow! Poor guy dragged his sorry self out of bed at 5 a.m. to head to the airport. Thankfully I didn't have to drive him.

We've been working in little bits on the house. I converted an upstairs closet to a pantry and we are now about to paint what used to be Caris' room and make it our office/school room. Caris had chosen dark purple and lime green for her room (it's an assortment of spots and stripes right now - and we're going to paint over it into a calm and serene hmmmm very pale blue. It should look nice.

BUT the whopping most exciting news.....which I've of course saved for last...is that we are broke! And WHY are we broke?? Because we've just booked 2 weeks of language study in Antigua Guatemala and then one week visiting in a northern village called Tactic (pronounced Tackteek). We sponsor a child in this village named Mynar. For $34 per month Mynar's cycle of poverty and illiteracy can be changed. There are many children in need of this type of sponsorship and I'll be happy to point you in the right direction if you are interested. Yes, three weeks with our whole family in Guatemala. My sister and her family are coming and even my parents will join us for part of it. We are beyond excited.

2008-02-29T09:35:00.001-08:00

The picture is of revolutionaries Che Guevara & Fidel Castro.

We don't have cable or satellite. Not for any high ground moral reason - we just really don't watch much TV and paying for it would be a waste of money. But that leaves us with only CBC to watch. Which is actually great by us. The only show that our whole family watches is "Little Mosque on the Prairie". We love it - who knows why it appeals so much to us all.

But on Thursday nights they have "Doc Zone" which features a different documentary each week. Last night was about Fidel Castro. I missed the first little bit so I've still got so many questions but it explained a great deal to me. What a fascinating story - his revolution, his brutality, his ideals, his passion and his charisma. He made some horrendous mistakes through his life and yet still, millions love him. He was so interesting to watch in old clips. I'm not sure I could put a finger on what it is about him - but you find yourself wanting to like him. Maybe his passion spills over and even if you don't agree with him - you finding yourself wanting whatever it is that he's got. You want to feel that way about something!

He'd be on my list of people I'd like to meet. But he'd really have to get rid of that cigar first...

2008-02-26T08:10:00.000-08:00

Larry Norman died on Sunday.

Most of you are probably wondering who the heck he was - briefly, he was an American musician. A pioneer of Christian rock'n'roll. He was hard hitting, poetic, counter-culture. Often an outside voice throughout his career. All reasons why I loved him.

In part of the letter he dictated just before he died he says:

I feel like a prize in a box of cracker jacks with God's hand reaching down to pick me up. I have been under medical care for months. My wounds are getting bigger. I have trouble breathing. I am ready to fly home.

I'm glad he found his wings. May he rest in peace.

Thanks for the memories.

2008-02-25T16:41:00.000-08:00

What a week.

a very successful week.

We were able to be a part of a fund raising event for a young man named Cooter. No, that's not his real name - but now that I've met him - it suits. The event was held at Chawathil Hall - one of the many First Nation reserves that surround Hope. It was organized by our friends Mark & Lisa with the filling in of the cracks by us and a few other friends. We offered up home-made soup and buns, a silent auction, a 50/50 draw and then a loonie auction. We could hardly fit people in. What a great problem to have. At the end of the day we were able to present Cooter with $2900. It'll go a long way for him and his family. And you know, it was so much fun.

People from all walks of life - that wouldn't ever have opportunity to meet, talk, or spend time together. People able to give money yes - but more than that - they offered support and community just by showing up.

2008-02-12T11:23:00.000-08:00

YOU ARE INVITED!!!!

To a Fundraiser for Jason "Cooter" Hughes. Cooter is a young (in his 20's) man who lives on the Chawathil Reserve and is battling cancer. We are holding a Soup & Bun lunch and Loonie Auction. $5.00 for homemade soup & buns and then of course loonies for tickets to win all kinds of stuff. All the proceeds will go to Cooter.

When: Sunday February 24
Chawathil Community Hall
4:00 to 6:00 p.m.

Should be fun and it's for a good cause. Hope to see you there.

2008-02-11T10:40:00.000-08:00

We went to Langara College on Saturday to take in a few documentaries at the Codev World Community Film Festival. Their purpose in their own words...

Our theme reflects the urgent need to acknowledge and celebrate resistance and the fight for human rights in communities across the world. It is especially important at a time when we often feel swamped by waves of reaction and repression. The more we learn from other struggles, the more inspired we will be to create a different world.

These documentaries show communities and individuals around the globe working to create change. We at CoDevelopment Canada hope that these stories bring you hope and energy to stand up for your rights, to resist the forces that push you back, and to make a difference in your life and community.

We took the girls as well, even though they are probably a bit young to really grasp some of the ideas being discussed. But what it did do was allow them to see that there is more going on in the world than we see. That there are injustices that abound and that we must raise our voice in protest of.

The first film the girls and I saw was called "Radical Simplicity", which is also a book that I've now ordered from the library. It was essentially a challenge to consider the call to sustainability. The second film, both the girls and I really enjoyed. It was called "Me and my mosque" and was a film by a Canadian Moslem woman and her journey to bring women equality in her religion. It was very well done and fun to watch. Although, both my girls were outraged by the way many women are treated in some - not all though - Mosques. I enjoyed watching them be stirred at the thought of someone telling them they couldn't do something just because they were female. Reid saw a couple films about Fair Trade Coffee and War and Media. It made for great discussion all the way home!

I'm already looking forward to next year. The girls will be a little older and we can aspire to a little more.

2008-02-06T08:40:00.000-08:00

Well....since you asked.

I have given great thought to whom I would vote for if I could take part in the current election in the States. I never even once for a second considered voting Republican. So that left me with two options: Hilary Clinton or Barack Obama. Both are brilliant, and both would be 'firsts' if elected.

All that said, I never clicked with Hilary. I'd really love to see a woman as President of the U.S. Would I ever. And actually, I think she'd do fine if she is the one to win the Democratic nomination. But there is something about her that I can't put my finger on, something that just doesn't work for me.

But my first choice would be Obama. Hands down. He's a powerful speaker. He's charismatic, he speaks with integrity, grace and authority. He stirs hope within me - that change is possible, it really could happen.

Yes We Can.
Yes, we can.

2008-02-05T08:29:00.000-08:00

Super Tuesday!

It's a big voting day today in the United States. And more shockingly - I'm very very interested. On CBC's The National last night they said that 15% of Canadians would trade their vote in the next Canadian election to take part in this U.S. election. That is unheard of. I think I may even be one of them.

I'm sure Mr. McCain will win on the Republican side. But it is the Democratic race that has me enthralled. Imagine. A woman or a black man.

It is history just waiting to be written.

2008-02-02T09:49:00.000-08:00

Simplicity, clarity, singleness:
these give our lives power and vividness and joy.
~Richard Holloway, Anglican Bishop

2008-01-30T08:59:00.000-08:00

I was at a funeral yesterday. It was for a local first nations woman who lived on the street. She was a serious alcoholic and probably had a few other addiction besides. I went because our good friends have her children as their foster children. And we love them.

It was held out at the Chawathil Reserve in the community hall. A few things struck me. There was a poster on the wall with pictures of Charmaine - as a child, a teen, a mom. On this poster were all kinds of words describing Charmaine. Daughter, mom, cousin, auntie, friend, etc etc. When we see people who abuse substances, who live on the street, who are difficult - we so quickly label them. But we don't remember those other labels of 'daughter, mom, auntie, friend'.

It was a "Shaker" service. Which I still don't really understand. It began with drumming and the songs, I suppose, of mourning and remembrance. I love this. I love the drums, the songs without words. It is very guttural, very basic, very earthy. It touches something deep down inside me. Then Charmaine's brothers and sisters gathered around her coffin (canoe they called it), held candles and 'sang' and prayed. Finally, they circled the coffin, we all stood and it ended with a viewing. Following this was a potluck lunch. Many in the Chawathil community were there.

I didn't enjoy the whole service. But there were elements I loved. It was interesting.

The most powerful thing for me was the challenge to look beyond a persons exterior. To look beyond the addictions, the mental health issues, the simple fact that they are different from me. To look and see a person. A human being who is someone's daughter or son, someone's friend. Someone who, just like me is in need of love and acceptance. As they are. For who they are and not who I expect them to be.

And when I can see past all the junk and love them - I proclaim the Kingdom of God. Because in God's Kingdom - no one is unlovable, no one goes hungry or is cold. No one unreachable.

2008-01-28T13:39:00.000-08:00

egad moments...

-I was filling out my passport application and had to fill in "gray" as the colour of my hair.

-My oldest is actually old enough to be off on weekends away with the Youth Group.

-I actually chose salad because I liked it - not because I had to.

-I'm aware of the plunging stock market.

-I prefer CBC radio to 'music' radio

2008-01-24T08:57:00.000-08:00

I know that the U.S. celebrated Martin Luther King day a couple days ago. What can I say- I'm running a little slow these days. I found this quote and have been thinking about it a great deal. To react to hate with hate is really, a typical human response. Of course, Jesus taught a different way. It is in responding with light and love that we bring the Kingdom of God to our very broken world. I proclaim God's love when I reach out to the unlovable and take care of them.

"Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that."

Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

2008-01-22T08:22:00.000-08:00

Zero. Zip. Nada.

I didn't complain at all yesterday. I'm quite happy with those results. The challenge of course, is to continue and see how many days you can go without complaining. In general, I am not a complainer. I have my moments - but on the whole - I'm not one to gripe.

So maybe a twist on this challenge would be to not even respond with the negative slant. I was chatting with my brother yesterday and we were talking about how we tend to answer questions to the negative. For example, "How are you doing?" ..."Oh, not bad" or "I'm alright - but so busy!" etc etc etc. You get the idea. We seldom answer a simple "great" or "I'm really doing well thanks". For whatever reason our culture has deemed it necessary that we can't be truly positive & happy (lest we call you names!) and must talk with a bias to the negative.

So I'm going to try to catch that to. Maybe I don't complain, but perhaps I don't let on how truly content I am - or maybe I'm not even aware of how at peace I am.

and by the way...I'm really feeling great today. Thanks for asking.