It wasn't supposed to be this way.

I thought I'd return from our trip to Guatemala refreshed, renewed, rejuvenated. and I suppose I was for the first week. I mean hey, I'm starting this brand new chapter in my life...both kids in school full time, which translates to days to fill with, with, well - now you see my problem. Fill with what? I want to fill my days with things that are of value to me. Things that need doing - yes, but also those things that will satisfy me on a deeper, more spiritual level. While I ponder those slightly huge questions I'm going to begin by painting the inside of my house. Mindless work that I actually do enjoy. Lots of time to listen to CBC radio and plan my next step.

Of course I never counted on the unexpected. Like this most wicked cold I've been saddled with. It began yesterday and today has grown to most mammoth proportions. I feel cranky. I feel whiny.

But all of this pales. Totally pales when I think of my dear sweet friends Terry & Juanita. And I do think of them constantly through the day. The Stauffers are mourning their 14 yr old daughter Emily who was murdered on Sat. night. I'm still broken for them. Broken for them - and so grateful as I look in my kitchen at lunch time and watch a pile of 14 yr olds as they chat, laugh and generally be loud.

I'm reminded acutely now, in that perspective that only tragedy brings, that I am beyond blessed to have Caris, and her dearest friends Becca, Rachel and Frankie. All 14 and very much alive.

And blessing lives all around them.